Tuesday, March 27

Tiger Woods Recognized by Merriam-Webster Dictionary

Woods in dictionary (Allison)
MERRIAM-WEBSTER, AN ENCYCLOPEDIA Britannica Company, today announced that Tiger Woods, the former No. 1 golfer in the world, has been officially added as the fourth entry in the definition of the word “back.” The surprising move by one of the world’s most respected dictionaries comes on the heels of Woods’s win at the Arnold Palmer Invitational, his first official victory in more than 30 months on the PGA Tour.

It’s highly unusual for a proper name to be used in a definition for a common word. Consequently, there was a swift negative reaction from some etymologists who suggested that Merriam-Webster was unduly influenced by the public outpouring of support and the titanic media onslaught that followed the golfer’s long-awaited win.

But the dictionary defended its action, saying in a statement, “We believe, along with everyone else, that Tiger is back. All we’ve done is to document that known fact, to say that ‘back’ is Tiger Woods.”

The dictionary added that, in recognition of Woods, “back” would soon be featured as word of the day at its popular website.

Following is the newly released definition by Merriam-Webster.

back noun \ˈbak\

Definition of BACK

1 a (1) : the rear part of the human body especially from the neck to the end of the spine (2) : the body considered as the wearer of clothes (3) : capacity for labor, effort, or endurance (4) : the back considered as the seat of one’s awareness of duty or failings (5) : the back considered as an area of vulnerability
b : the part of a lower animal (as a quadruped) corresponding to the human back
c : spinal column
d : spine 1c

2 a : the side or surface opposite the front or face : the rear part; also : the farther or reverse side
b : something at or on the back for support
c : a place away from the front

3: a position in some games (as football or soccer) behind the front line of players; also : a player in this position

4: Tiger Woods

A Merriam-Webster representative would not comment on the rumor that Woods would move up to the second definition of “back” if he wins the Masters in two weeks.

(This is an ARMCHAIR GOLF spoof.)


Brian Kuehn said...

Clever. Nicely done.

It must bug you just a little bit to have to list this after you have had your fun:

(This is an ARMCHAIR GOLF spoof.)

Still, it is likely infinitely better to do that than to respond to the inevitable flak from people born without a funny bone.

Michael Cole said...

You got me! I read the post and got really frustrated for a second! On a serious note, Tiger is never going to return to his former dominance. He might win many more tournaments, but the old Tiger will never be 'back'. Rather, the new Tiger has arrived. He's changed and can never be who he was again.

Charles Prokop said...

This gave me a good chuckle, and after the round I had this morning I needed it. And I agree with Michael that all the talk about "back" misses the point. The interesting question is who Tiger is now and how he'll play. I'm sure we'll have ample opportunity to see - he'll certainly dominate the TV for the foreseeable future.

Val B said...

I'm laughing out loud at the idea that any of us started to bite. Well done and thanks for the laugh!

Just found your blog and look forward to reading more.

FlemingIslandGolfCourses said...

Hahaha this is pretty funny and ingenious!